Out on the streets of the US of A with Marcia Wells

23 years ago I met Miss Marcia Wells at Chelmsford Primary School, a bond was formed and unbeknown to us was the love we shared for travelling.  23 years later I was happy to catch up and hear more about her new life in the United States.

Miss Wells enjoying some free time on the beach

Who is Marcia Wells

I’m a young, vibrant 28year old woman embarking on a journey that has no destination. I was born and raised in Newcastle. I grew up with 7 siblings. I enjoy traveling, meeting and working with different kinds of people. I like to explore the world around me and have an open mind about everything life has to offer. I am constantly growing spiritually and emotionally and I take the time to continue learning.

I am modest, hard-working and consistently set firm goals for myself. Then, once I’ve defined my benchmarks, I take the necessary steps to achieve those milestones. I am a people’s person who always thinks positively and sees every hardship as a step closer to victory. I love my life and wouldn’t change it for anything in the world.

What inspired you to work abroad?  

Growing up, I always had relatives to look up to who are living and traveling abroad. I always wondered what life was like on the other side of the world, a world I could only dream of. I have aunts living in France, England and Australia, therefore I always knew that nothing was impossible.

The only reason why I didn’t take up my journey sooner was the love of my life, my grandmother who has now departed (God rest her soul). She had suffered 2 strokes in a space of 5yrs. I was helping take care of her and loved every minute of it. 

She always told me that I could do anything I set my mind to, so in 2010 I decided then, it was the right time to live my dreams. I knew it wouldn’t be easy but oh boy it’s been worth it, every step of the way! My ticket out of my beautiful country, South Africa, was through an Au pair agency, and the rest, so they say, is history.

What did your gran mean to you?

My gran Regina was like a mother to me. She raised me at the tender young age of 5.  She was my pillar of strength, my rock. She nurtured me into this wise, strong humble person that I am today. She taught me about love, how to be compassionate through bible studies, how to be my own person and most importantly she put the fear of God in me. I remember as a child you could be as sick as a dog but church is where we all went on Sunday. She would say to us when we weren't feeling well and didn't want to go to church, "This is the time you need God the most... Kuncono ufele esontweni" meaning, it's better to die in Church.  She was a humbled person and lived her life for God.

Why was it so important to you, to look after her instead of following your dreams?

As my gran aged and started experiencing complications starting with a near fatal car accident, I felt a personal responsibility to see to her well-being. She suffered a stroke and lost her speech. This really shook the whole family. Even though I was young, I knew God had placed me there for a reason. Here is a woman who had done everything for us, sacrificed everything for our happiness and well-being, making sure we had a good education , now she is the one who needed to be taken care of in the same manner, with the same love if not more.

I thanked God and I still do, for honoring me with the duties and responsibilities of taking care of my dearest Regina. She was the family's treasure and I Marcia Wells was lucky enough to take care of her for All those years. I had my dreams, they were still alive in me, I had even gotten many opportunities to pursue those dreams but I had a duty, a duty that was bigger and more important than any dream of mine. This duty was given to me by God himself. Who was I to refuse him? So, I humbly accepted.

It’s impressive to hear such wisdom from a young person, It can be hard watching others move on up as you tend to your duties.  Though when someone has given so much of their life what are a few years of your life in preparation for a home-coming.  Do you have any pearls of wisdom that your gran shared with you?

 

-         My gran always told us to live a life that is accepted by God. Seeing her devote her life to the church was wisdom for me. She knew I always admired and wanted to be like my aunts that were abroad,  she would always tell me to “work hard for my dreams, anything is possible.”

-         She always said prayer is a weapon and we should use it, whatever we wanted we need to just pray to God and it shall be so. I vaguely remember when I was about 13yrs old during our evening prayer sessions she would say we have to pray to find good husbands or just good me. You pray for him, she said, I remember thinking to myself how ridiculous that was but I guess she was right, 25years later. 

Why did you choose USA? Did you have to make any sacrifices?

Actually,  USA chose me… I had applied to many different countries, my main focus being working on cruise ships, it didn’t matter to me where I ended up, as long as I was somewhere out there, but my destiny led me to the USA.

I left everything I’ve ever known and loved in South Africa, my family (whom I miss dearly), my job and friends for a foreign country that has no ties with my heritage. A place where I thought I’d be an orphan, but little did I know I would create special, unbreakable bonds with the families & friends I’ve gotten to know.  Last but certainly not least, this country brought me the love of my life….Florian. In a way those sacrifices turned out to be blessings.

   

Success and Love! How did you make it happen?

I was determined to succeed in my new found journey, I knew this was what I wanted and there wasn’t any other way. I was lucky enough to have the agency help me every step of the way with applications and travel arrangements and with all my savings I had saved up, packed my bags and was on the plane to New York.

Florian and Marcia

What studies have you pursued in the US?

I am a double major, studying healthcare administration and health studies.

Wow girl, a double major! That is impressive; working so hard I’m surprised you have a special someone in your life.  Who is Florian?

Florian... What can I say... Mmmmh... He is the man I've been praying for, for the past 15yrs. A special man sent to me by God himself.

Amen! How did you two meet? 

We met on a dating website which is quiet common in the US. We have such busy lives, with me working and studying and he being a research scientist in Philadelphia. There just wasn’t enough time to go out and meet people, so this method was most convenient for us and worked!

Ours is a special story: two people from different countries, ethnicity and background leaving their home countries and meeting in a country that is foreign to both of us. Florian is from Germany and well I came to the US on work.  3 countries, 2 people:  Germany meets South Africa in the USA. What can I say it’s an intercontinental love tale.

 

3 countries, 2 people

Indeed it is certainly a “intercontinental love tale” Are there any challenges to dating someone from a different culture?

Oh yes, firstly our ethnicity stands out. Even though the country has come a long way with racial issues, it will always be there all over the world. 

Gurl! Tell me about it! I found that when you in love with someone, you are in love with them it’s the world that sees the difference but the two of you see each other.

That’s it! You can't run from what the world sees and how you feel, so you just deal with it. We both love food, we love experiencing different kinds of cuisines from countries all over the world. We love good things and we enjoy the same music.

Religiously, we are both Catholics so there are no issues in that. That was kind of important to me but not a deal breaker. When it comes to culture there wasn't much if a difference. I feel that dating a European guy was more rewarding than dating an American.

Really!?! How so?

There was an evident cultural difference with an American guy that I didn't necessarily agree with, but they are good people.

 So how does dating a foreign guy compare to dating a South African?

*Laughs* Dating a South African was a different ball game altogether, let's just say I'm happy where I am today! My Florian,  Rocks my world !!❤️️

What about you has changed since you started traveling?

I would say that I’m definitely very open-minded about different cultures. I’ve achieved things that I never imagined I could. I’ve even decided to further my studies as I of all people really believe that education is the key to my success. I’ve been able to adjust being on my own without any family near me and taking important decisions without doubting myself. I still value my families input every now and then but I can say I am more of my own person than I ever was.

How do you see the world since you left South Africa?

There is definitely a bigger world out there that needs to be explored, I was confined within the borders of South Africa, I had never even traveled to other African countries. People live differently all over the world and you seem to take for granted the little things that your own country has to offer. For me, the independence is easily achieved in the USA and you have no choice but to be a hard worker. I love the fact that I can get internet almost anywhere I go, being able to get a car with not much hassles, and being a working girl… feels good, really good. When I first arrived in the USA, the culture shock wasn’t that bad for me, I guess I had already tried to live the American way even before I left home…LOL… I had lots of inspiration as I had mentioned earlier.

Do you like the food? How did you find the culture?

The food took a while to get used to. I must say, I miss our South African food. The braai’s, chakalaka, chicken dust that you get on the corner of the street, vetkoek and mince on a cold winter’s day…ohhhh man!  Those were the days. Local will always be lekker !!! ALWAYS… I miss listening to the traditional Zulu songs, strange but true, what  do they call it again?

uMaskandi music?

Yes! *laughing*  I even miss those horrible taxi rides from Madadeni to eMpangeni, eating Porto and cheese Russians in the back seat. Yes, there’s a lot I miss about South Africa, but I’ve found my new love for the kinds of food I’ve been introduced to here, the culture and the way of life.

The things we appreciate are often the ones that irritated us at the time.  What are the lessons you have learnt whilst abroad?

-Doing things in life that scared you at first can be very rewarding!!!

-   First and foremost, you have to have faith in the Lord Almighty and never give up on your dreams.

-   Despite the culture shock, I observed and learnt from the new environment. I didn’t cling to my life in my home town, instead I took this new opportunity to learn from it and grow as a person.

-  One of my biggest learning areas was to understand different cultures, be more flexible with my beliefs and points of view and to find out that although some people can be very different from you they can also be the biggest part of your life. When you live abroad you understand the value and meaning of things.

-         I try to be more organized, and of course, I appreciate the people closest to my heart and the value of money.

You mentioned that it is now easier for you to make your own decisions without influence, why is it easier now?

I strongly believe that taking a step in your life such as leaving your family, friends, home and all that is familiar to you, moving to a foreign land with absolutely no one to call your own is not for sissies.  Actually surviving the distance and creating a good quality of life for yourself without your support system is for the brave.

 I had no choice but to put in my "big girl panties" and take care of business!  You grow up fast in just one month, you can see the difference. I realized at that point that there was no mommy or daddy to bail me out and advise me in day to day decisions.

The most important person in my life is me. I started to follow my heart and I did things that made me happy and were good for me.

Would you like to see more countries? If so, where to next and why?

Yes, definitely, I would love to visit my family in France, England and Australia. Though my first stop is going to be Germany; Florian and I are going to spend Christmas holidays with his family and I will get the chance to explore his beautiful hometown.

Have you started any new hobbies?

Yes 2! I now enjoy food…I mean really taking the time to explore various kinds of restaurants and the diverse cuisine on offer. Florian and I love to cook, but he is the Master chef in our home. I’ve also recently joined the gym which became very necessary due to hobby number one…Lol…

What message do you want to share out there with other guys and girls of color?

Anything is possible if you believe in it, put your fears aside and work hard for your goal. It is every individual’s right to want the best in life regardless of your race, color or creed.

In Conclusion:

One of the biggest lessons I’ve learnt during my time living, working and studying abroad is how much you can get to know yourself. Not only have I found out what my limits are but I’ve learnt how to fiercely face my fears.